Tags
Recently actress Tamara Mowry-Housley sat down for a candid interview where she revealed that her and her new hubby Adam Housley waited three years before having sex and then decided to refrain from sex again before their wedding earlier this year.
According to Tamara:
“I’m being very honest. We actually didn’t wait before we got married to be intimate…but we did wait 3 years. (The two have been together for 6 years). I wanted to do what felt right for me. I became re-virginized. It’s something that just felt right for me. It was just a personal choice. And even after being intimate, we decided as a couple to be celibate until the wedding.”
Now this isn’t the first time I’ve heard of a couple deciding not to have sex as they prepare for their wedding and it’s definitely not the first time I’ve heard of a couple waiting a while before they have sex for the first time. But three years??? I totally respect Tamara and Adam’s decision to wait for the right time to have sex. I personally have waited a year and a half in one relationship, but three, I’m not sure I could do it. Not because I’m some freak horndog who needs to get it in all the time, but just because for me personally the temptation would probably be too great, especially if he’s around all the time. Now three years without being in a relationship, I can do that standing on my head.
However, I guess that’s kind of the point. Celibacy is about more than just giving up sex, it’s about strength and resisting the natural temptations that can so easily lead us all down the wrong path. It’s about going through the fire together and coming out on the other side as a stronger unit. Relationships that are supposed to stand the test of time have ended over lack of sex. Happy homes have been destroyed by the betrayal of affairs, and many of us have thrown potential life partners to the wayside because the sex was right. But if sex is that big of a deal breaker, and you could hold out three years before taking that intimate step, isn’t it possible that your relationship could withstand anything? Isn’t that one less obstacle to come between you two, one less worry for those times when the sex isn’t as hot as it used to be? Maybe Tamara, Adam and all the other celibate couples out there are on to something. On to something that could help us take control of our lives and create the strong and healthy relationships we’re all searching for.
So, could you be in a celibate relationship? Have you ever been celibate? How did it affect your relationship?
I have been a celibate relationship if you want to call it that. We waited from months because we both didn’t want just a buddy. I’ve also been celibate by myself which ended a short time ago. Damn it man!! LOL..but I think it depends on the people and their communciation on what they feel.
Abstinence is not the most difficult thing. From a relationship point of view, that’s how you get to know if a person’s for you. If they’re looking for just another conquest, that’ll shine through, no question. I don’t know if I could make it three years, but I would be open to trying. I will say that.
Hope all’s well with you.
Wow, you would really attempt to wait three years? Not too many men would even attempt that. I think having someone committed to the same goal would make the wait more tolerable.
Hope all is well with you too
Like you, it’s not that difficult to abstain because we aren’t going to just go shag some random stranger. It’s a lot more difficult when you’re with someone one on one in each other’s homes.
I’ve been giving the subject of celibacy a lot of thought lately, I think the next relationship I find myself in that talk will happen. Can I do it? I haven’t the slightest clue, but I’d love to try and see how long we last. I’d love making it a bet just to add some fun to it. Lol.
Exactly!
The more I think about it the more I believe that holding out isn’t the problem, it’s finding a partner who is willing to hold out with you. Tamara and her husband were both on the same page with the choice which made it easier for them to stick to it. Still not saying I would wait three years lol, but having someone who was willing to wait at least a year or so would make waiting much easier.