Should Prostitution Be Legal?

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Bonn Germany, bunny ranch, oldest profession, Prostitution, Sex

It’s the world’s oldest profession.  The one job never down in a recession, never short on supply or demand and will be around long after we’ve gone on to the other side.  Sex.  Pretty much all over the United States the selling or purchasing of sex is against the law.  The only place (that I know of) where selling sex is legal is at the Bunny Ranch in Carson City, Nevada, other than that, sex is sold in secrecy at discreet brothels, online or on street corners near you.  The threat of jail time and fines has not stopped people from selling and buying sex and for years interest groups and law makers have debated on whether or not to make prostitution legal in the U.S.  The argument is that in addition to slowing down or stopping prostitution related crime and human trafficking, legalizing the sale of va jay-jay could actually become a vital source of income for our government.  On the other side, the argument ranges from the selling of sex being immoral, to encouraging promiscuity and unsafe sexual practices.

Over in Europe however things are a bit different.  While not every country or city is on board with va jay-jay sales, some have made it a legal and profitable part of their society.  In Bonn Germany for example, not only is prostitution legal, but the city collected around $20,000 from prostitution taxes after the it installed sex meters that require ladies of the night to purchase tickets to work the streets at night.  The city even hired guards to patrol and protect workers, it also constructed special wooden garages, or “consummation areas,” near the machines where customers can park their cars and have sex.  Bonn feels the move is a huge success.

While I personally wouldn’t sell my body or encourage anyone else to, the fact still remains that prostitution is occurring in this country even as you read this post.  Many women feel this life is their only option and no matter how many times we arrest them or try to get them other forms of employment, prostitution is the life they know and choose.  And no matter how many johns get caught up in those undercover stings on COPS or how many madams ruin the lives of high powered men with their little black books, sex is going to be an in demand commodity.  So why not legalize and regulate it?

Do you think prostitution should be legal?

Real Women Travel Alone!

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Travel, Travel Tips, Traveling alone, Women and travel

We all have the memories.  Pictures of us and our closest girlfriends lounging on sandy beaches in Bermuda or partying till dawn in Ibiza.  As amazing women it goes without saying that we all have great groups of girlfriends to share our lives with and some of our fondest memories are of things we did and places we’ve been with our girls.  However as we get older and life moves us each in new and different directions, it gets harder and harder to spend that quality time with each other.  Does that mean that life ends and you just sit at home waiting for schedules to coordinate?  So many women (and people in general) are afraid to travel alone.  They worry about the stares they will get from strangers or how they could possibly have fun in a new country without their best buds.  Truth is, real women travel alone!  Sure it’s great to have your friends along to share the experience, but traveling alone can open your eyes to so many things you didn’t know about yourself and can be even more fun than traveling with a group.  Life is way too short to miss out on all its wonders sitting around waiting for other people to join you.  Here are some tips on how to see the world all by your lonesome….and love every minute of it!

Safety First!

Make sure you thoroughly research the countries you plan on visiting!  Safety comes first, especially when traveling alone, so make sure you’re aware of what’s going on in the country, what areas are safe/unsafe for tourists and write down local emergency numbers.  Also, plan your travel arrangements in each city so you’re not at a lost on how you’ll be getting around.

Go Where The Fun Is

Sure vacations are about lounging and relaxing, but don’t get tempted to stay at that exclusive resort in the middle of nowhere just because it has a great spa.  You can spa at home!  Pick a hotel in the heart of the city so that you’re close to all the tourist attractions, local nightlife and trendy restaurants.  Being in the mix will ensure that there is always something for you to do and see.

Don’t Listen To Your Mother, Talk To Strangers

Most people hate traveling alone because they feel they’ll have no one to talk to, but they couldn’t be more wrong.  Talk to the woman shopping in the vintage store you find in Spain or the group of guys watching football in the pub in London.  You might find that these people are tourists just like you or better yet locals who are friendly and more than willing to give you insider tips on how best to enjoy their hometown.

Do As Locals Do

Tourist life is great, but one of the best ways to truly enjoy a solo vacation is to live life as a local.  If it’s customary for locals to drink espresso and eat pastries everyday at 3pm, find yourself a cafe and join in.  If locals usually ride the trolley around town, hop on.  Experience the country through their eyes and you’ll walk away with a whole new appreciation for their way of life.

Get Lost

Don’t be afraid to travel off the beaten path.  Take the train to the last stop or walk through a town aimlessly, you never know what you may find that can make the experience a memorable one.

Live In The Moment

Try not to plan every single moment of your vacation.  Force yourself to do and try things you wouldn’t otherwise.  Take in a street festival and try new foods or partake in a local custom.  Live the experience without the confines of time and most importantly TURN. THE. PHONE. OFF.  Twitter and Facebook will be there waiting for your updates when you get home.

Do you like to travel alone?

3 Ways To Survive A Group Trip With Your Girls

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group trips, Travel Tips, Travel with friends, Women and travel

When most people think of group trips they think of a disaster waiting to happen. Most people I know wouldn’t dare go on a vacation with more than three other people, if that. As someone who regularly travels with a large (15+) group of women I definitely feel your pain. It can be a hassle trying to deal with all of the different moods, needs, wants and personalities. One bad experience with a girls only group trip can scar you for life! It’s definitely a challenge, but trust me, it’s not impossible. Before you turn your next group trip into a solo one, consider these three tips and turn your next ladies getaway from scary to spectacular.

Be Selective

I know it seems cruel to even think about traveling without one of your close friends, but not every friend is a travel friend. Your girl Tasha might be cool for brunches and the occasional trip to a lounge, but on a week long vacation she might be your worst nightmare. Make sure you pick friends with easy going laid back personalities that will not only mesh with yours during the course of the trip, but with your other guests as well. If you know Tasha is boughetto and Mia has strong opinions about everything, it may not be wise to have them both on the same trip. Choose wisely and your sanity will thank you later.

Plan Ahead

When I mentioned earlier that I travel with 15+ women regularly I could feel the “Oh no that is too much estrogen for me,” in the air. However, one of the things that make the trips work is that we plan ahead. Our designated trip planner makes sure that not only are tours arranged and/or paid for before we leave, but she sends out a very detailed itinerary of each day that includes all activities and anticipated costs. And we love her dearly for it! Nothing takes an amazing trip downhill faster than people arguing about where to go, what to do and how much things cost. Be sure to let people know in advance what the plans and anticipated costs are this way they can set their budgets accordingly and when they arrive to the destination they know exactly what to expect.

Split Up

Yes it’s supposed to be a group trip, but being around each other 24/7 would wear on anyone’s nerves. Enjoy the major attractions and sights as a group, but when you get a little down time break off into smaller groups and explore your vacation destination with your roommate or your bestie in the group. It will give you a much needed breather and the stories you all will have when you meet up again later could make for some great laughs.

 

Is Oral Reciprocity Necessary?

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Braxton Family Values, Oral, Reciprocity, Sex

On the latest episode of Braxton Family Values Trina confessed to her sisters that she had an “oral transaction” with one of her band mates. Immediately the other sisters, Tamar, Towanda and Toni, wanted to know if she was on the receiving end of the exchange and when Trina admitted that the transaction was one way on her end only, you couldn’t catch the dropped jaws of her sisters (and myself) fast enough. The consensus was that Trina shouldn’t have “slobbed the knob” as Tamar so eloquently put it, without a little oral reciprocity…especially since she wanted to tell her husband about it.

But just when I was all set to take sides with the other sisters on the issue and agree that the slob needs to be a two way street, Trina said something that made me think twice. In short, Trina said that sometimes you’re a giver and sometimes you’re a receiver and that she enjoyed being solely the giver this time around. Is that such a bad thing? Can’t you simply want to do something for your partner because you enjoy the act and/or enjoy seeing them pleased, and not because you expect something in return? Now I don’t agree with Trina’s infidelity and I don’t condone slobbing any and every knob or eating every pie, but there are women and men out there who genuinely enjoy being on the giving end. They can take or leave a return on the favor and get their satisfaction from being able to get their partner off, and if you’re someone who isn’t really into giving, this deal is a match made in heaven. Is it nice to get a little oral reciprocity from time to time? Damn sure is! But I don’t think it’s necessary in order for the act to be pleasurable and worthwhile.

Thoughts?

Learning The Art Of Patience

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Goals, Patience

 

Something really good is coming. I don’t know when, where or how good, but it’s coming. I might have to go through hell to get there, but on the other side will be something good. How do I know this? Because the power-tripping without the facts, ego bruising, dream crushing negative Nancys are out in full force! In the past I’ve dealt with these situations by going with my first gut reaction which is usually to curse people out, fight, quit and break some ish. But what I’ve learned over the years is, other than the fact that these tactics rarely get you anywhere, whenever these situations rear their ugly little heads my life is about to change and for the better.

The problem is I hate the waiting! I hate having to deal with the drama in order to get to the peace. I want my good now, I don’t want to fight, but then someone says “Good things come to those who wait” and I’m reminded to be patient. Being patient isn’t as easy as it sounds though, it’s hard work. Learning how to wait in hell when you can see the light just over the horizon can be a gut wrenching feeling and one that I’m still learning to deal with. I end up having to be patient with patience. But it’s hard. It’s hard to be patient when people with self serving ill intentions and wishes are picking away and circling you like vultures, it’s hard to wait for your turn at bat, but it’s in these moments that your patience is truly tested and all you’ve tried to learn about the lost art must be put into practice.

I continue to learn and practice my patience. With patience I’m learning that what is for me will come in time. I’m learning that even if the negative Nancys of the world temporarily get the upper hand and I must sit in hell for a while, if I’m patient, I won’t be down for long and as usual I will come out of it better and further along in the game than I was before. I’m learning that it’s best to deal with the bad instead of react to it because patience is testing my readiness for the good just ahead. I’m learning that patience is a virtue. So when I get to the point where I feel like I can’t be patient not one second longer I take a deep breath, crank Kanye’s Can’t Tell Me Nothing and have a silent word with God:

“Hey, it’s me…but you knew that already. I’m running out of patience here and need a little help. People are really gunning for me, nitpicking and trying to drag me through the mud and bring me down, but they gonna learn today. You tell your fallen angel and all his minions on earth to bring it, both guns blazing! I won’t b%#ch slap anyone…promise. Because when it’s all said and done and the flames subside you’ll make sure I get what I deserve and that they do too. No need to fight, no need to quit, all I have to do…is be patient.”

 

How do you practice patience?  Do you find it more difficult to be patient when faced with obstacles?

Time To Get Uncomfortable

Tags

Meeting New People, Nomadness TV, Travel

I don’t play well with others if I don’t know you.  Hell if you ask some of my friends they’d probably say I don’t play well with you even if I do know you.  It’s not because I’m mean, I just don’t do new people very well, I keep guards up and watch your every move like a hungry, rabid dog that thinks you’re about to run off with its bone.   There are a handful of people that have managed to wear me down, but other than that I stick to myself.   God must’ve been sick of my ish and felt it was time to shock my lone wolf behind in a big way so last month he decided it was time for me to get uncomfortable.

It all started innocently enough, me reading a blog that lead to me to another blog, that led me to a blog featured here on Clutch, Nomadness TV, and that is where the story really began.   Before I knew it I was signing up for Facebook (yes I know I was the only person alive or dead who didn’t have an account) just to join the closed Nomadness Tribe group.  In a matter of days I went from lurking in the shadows to engaging with these strangers, to going to a meet up…alone (no non-members were allowed so I couldn’t bring the usual back up that keeps you from having to meet anyone new) to spending New Year’s Eve drinking and laughing with a bunch of people whose real names I’m still trying to remember.  Sitting in a corner and hiding doesn’t work with these people, they find you and talk to you, want to know all about you, take pictures of and with you and just want to fill you with that ooey gooey love that would otherwise make you sick, but for some reason you can’t explain you like them so the gooey is okay.

Trust me when I say I’ve never been so far out of my element!  It was seriously system overload for me, everything I’ve ever tried to avoid socially got thrown at me hard.  I was so uncomfortable at the meet up that I felt constipated…gross but true.  I literally sat in one corner all night and STILL managed to meet like 10 new people.  Thought I could make a break for it when the event was over, oh hell no.  Not only did I end up at a Turkish place with three women I didn’t know, eating meat offered to us by four old men with an affinity for sistas and who we swore were in some kind of Turkish mob, but I ended up at a bar with most of the group until 3am!

Anyone that knows me knows I avoid these types of situations like the plague, even with my friends.  I don’t want you to get to know me, I don’t want to be friends and I damn sure don’t want to take pictures.  But for some reason I didn’t worry (well worry too much) about those things with this group.  It seemed perfectly logical to spend one of the biggest nights of the year with “the strangers from the internet” as my father so kindly described them after giving me a code word to use just in case they turned out to be crazy and I needed help.   Vacations with you?  Why sure, let’s go!  Pictures?  Yup, smile for the camera!

Who the hell am I?!

Eh, I’m still me, just a bit freer.  I spent so much time being uncomfortable about being uncomfortable, when it turns out being uncomfortable isn’t so bad at all.  I do play nice with others and I’ve got at least 30 or 40 “strangers from the internet” that can prove it!  It took me a LONG time to creep my way out of my comfort zone (ok God threw me out of the zone…same thing) but I’m glad I did.  Not only did I grow a little and overcome something that in some way was holding me back, but I met a bunch of strangers, who are fast becoming amazing, life changing friends and there’s definitely nothing scary or uncomfortable about that.